‎ABGESCHLOSSEN – 1450 $ in kostenlosen Chips von WinPalace Casino und LCB ‎in Funny Answers

Hello Everyone!‎

Seeing as how everybody here likes to laugh and enjoys participating in funny contests, here’s ‎one we’re sure you’ll enjoy:‎

Over the next 10 days we will be posting 20 funny questions, 2 per day.‎

The person who posts the funniest answer for each question will win a $50 Free Chip at ‎WinPalace Casino.‎

The person with the funniest answer for the last (20th) question will win a $500 Free Chip.‎

You can answer each question as many times as you wish.‎

Daily winners will be announced the following day.‎

You can help us choose the funniest replies by posting your personal favorites or just thanking ‎people for their replies.‎

Ready to play and win? ‎

Question #1 will be posted in just a few hours on Feb 10th at 12:01 am Eastern Time.‎

Woo Hoo, thanks daniel...sounds like a blast and very generous too.

Everybody ready?
Here are the first 2 questions:

1. How can you tell if a girl is bluffing?‎

2. What did the king of spades say to the queen of hearts?‎

As I mentioned before, you can answer only one of them or both, as many times as you like!

Let's start!

What did the king of spades say to the queen of hearts?

Hi babe, after you go black, you never go back.

1. How can you tell if a girl is bluffing?‎  Look, if she's happy and smiling, she's bluffing.  You obviously aren't married.

2. What did the king of spades say to the queen of hearts?‎  "Get on top so I can tell Jack I had a 'heart on'...."

As I mentioned before, you can answer only one of them or both, as many times as you like!

Let's start!

[/quote]

HAHAHA BULL!! I LOVE THE #2 ANSWER!  i was thinking tthe same idea but end it with a sleeve.  lol i love it

1/  She will agree and laugh at everything you said
2/  I wont have a change of heart

how can you tell a girl is bluffing? you dont, why ruin a good bluff job.

How can you tell if a girl is bluffing?‎
she'll give you a single digit number and tell you her roomies 'just a good friend'

2. What did the king of spades say to the queen of hearts?‎
Yeah diamonds last forever but i'll be the best 15 mins you've ever had

(:

How can you tell if a girl is bluffing?ý

Ans:  You can't - Why do you think so many men are walking around thinking they're great in the sack?

  How can you tell if a girl is bluffing?  When she calls out someone else's name

2. What did the king of spades say to the queen of hearts?ý
I'd like to "King" you  (oh no that may only be in checkers)

1. How can you tell if a girl is bluffing?‎
Her eyes look like need a GPS (looking everywhere but not at you)

2. What did the king of spades say to the queen of hearts?‎
its time we meet other people, lets 'SPLIT'

how can you tell if a girl is bluffing?        when you can see they have an Adams apple & a five o'clock shadow   

king of spades said "I dig you" to the queen of hearts

1. How can you tell if a girl is bluffing?

a) When the wife agrees!
b) The blonde understands!
c) She claims she`s a virgin!
d) Èvery time she claims: The size doesn`t matter!
e) She claims she didn`t take you for your money!

2. What did the king of spades say to the queen of hearts?

I`m above you and Jack is below as usual?

1. How can you tell if a girl is bluffing?ý

When she agree's with you.............

This is so much fun!
I see it's going to be very hard to choose the winner..

1. How can you tell if a girl is bluffing?

When she  is telling you you are the greatest player in the world

2. What did the king of spades say to the queen of hearts?

How does it come that you are not found a king of hearts

What does the king of spade say to the queen of hearts?

"Does your King have a 'Straight Deck' like I do??? Tell me, now who's your main king, now?"

lol.. oh wow i really lke my answer.. that should be written in the books.. =D

1. How can you tell if a girl is bluffing?ý
If you catch her yawning and checking her watch while making love.


2. What did the king of spades say to the queen of hearts?
If I come home one more time and find that Joker here, we are through!

1. How can you tell if a girl is bluffing?

She will laugh at everything you say even if it's not supposed to be funny.

2. What did the king of spades say to the queen of hearts?

Once you go black, you never go back.

1. How can you tell if a girl is bluffing?
a) When she tells you she's a natural blonde
b) Yes, these are my real breasts.

1. How can you tell if a girl is bluffing?ý

If when you go to kiss her, she throws up in her mouth a little bit! (By then, you should know, she was JUST being polite)

2. What did the king of spades say to the queen of hearts?ý

"Take your 'suit' off, and put mine on so I can make you Royally Flush"  :P

1. How can you tell if a girl is bluffing?

When she says "You're next"

2. What did the king of spades say to the queen of hearts?

Baby I "Dig" you.

Stop!
The first 2  questions are closed and we will announce yesterday's winners in few hours (it's much better then starting a day with a boring newspaper

Here are today's questions:

1. How much money is too much money?‎

2. Where do gamblers go when they die? ‎

Cheers,
Daniel

Here are today's questions:

1. How much money is too much money?ý
When it is confederate

2. Where do gamblers go when they die? ý
To that big casino in the sky

"Where do gamblers go when they die?"

Ok, not a "funny" answer, but I can tell you what I've been telling my friends & family for years..... 

I want to be cremated & my ashes made into a $5 token for the machines in Nevada, so I can go around & around & around & around in the slots & video poker machines forever! 

1. How much money is too much money?‎
-when you start to like monopoly-game money
-when you smell like one!
-crush some bills into a ball and throw it at a hobo's face!
-when you donate money to a robbed bank.
-when you wipe your butt with it!

2. Where do gamblers go when they die?
-heaven or hell table, place your bets please?

1. How much money is too much money?ý
When theres not enough room for all the zeros in your bank book
                                  or....
When you can't remember where all your banks are

1. How much money is too much money?

There`s no such thing as too much money!

After long discussions, these are yesterdays winners:

Maphesto:

1. How can you tell if a girl is bluffing?

a) When the wife agrees!
b) The blond understands!
c) She claims she`s a virgin!
d) Every time she claims: The size doesn't matter!
e) She claims she didn't take you for your money!

and Spearmint:

What did the king of spades say to the queen of hearts?‎

Yeah diamonds last forever but i'll be the best 15 mins you've ever had.

You both win $50 Free chip! 

Please PM me your usernames at Winpalace, so I could credit your accounts.
Cheers,
Daniel

1. How much money is too much money?ý

< When you start buying things you don't need from telemarketers
< When you do an internet search for the definition of "debt", "sale" or "coupon"
< When you start sending Donald Trump invoices

2. Where do gamblers go when they die? ý

< "Broke Back Mountain"

< "Dead Man's Hand Cemetary'

1. How much money is too much money?ý

a)When winpalace casino calls you for a loan!

b)When realistate on the moon starts looking good after dealing with needy inlaws.

c)when you complain that your matress feels lumpy because it should have been filled with $100's instead of $20's

d) when China starts sending "you" USA's invoices in hopes to get something back....

finally) when you end up on jay leno's tonight show as "the guy who has more cars than me!"

2. Where do gamblers go when they die? ý

a)hopefully not heaven, because if there are streets of gold, someone has bet them on a hand of black jack....

b) pergatory casino and lounge!

c) hell isn't for gamblers..... just casino owners = )

how much money is too much money?
when you could wipe your butt with it.
when all your bills are caught up.
where do gamblers go whn they die?
to hell if they're in the hole. to big casino in the sky if on the winning side.

How much money is too much money?
Hmm, not sure if thats possible, but if you deposit $10000 at a casino, lose it all, and then turn right around and deposit $10000 at the same casino.. Ide say thats too much money!

Where do gamblers go when they die?
Hmm, ide say the same place all the non-gamblers go, just a different room.
WinPalace please?? Yeah thats room W1. Thanks, LATER GUYS!!

Good morning/night,

I'll announce yesterday winners in few hours and now, it's time for today's questions:

1. How do you know if you are obsessed with gambling?‎

and

2. What was the best thing before sliced bread?

Shoot!


‎

1. How do you know if you are obsessed with gambling?‎

-obsessed? no i am not, I just want to give it one more try.
-when your bank account reached the minus zero  ( -0 )
-walking around in the casino on your pj's

2. What was the best thing before sliced bread?

can you gamble with that?

Hi,
Here are yesterdays winners:

Dj Tonic:

1. How much money is too much money?

a)When Winpalace casino calls you for a loan!

b)When real estate on the moon starts looking good after dealing with needy inlaws.

c)when you complain that your mattress feels lumpy because it should have been filled with $100's instead of $20's

d) when China starts sending "you" USA's invoices in hopes to get something back....

finally) when you end up on jay Leno's tonight show as "the guy who has more cars than me!"

and LhasaLover:

"Where do gamblers go when they die?"

I want to be cremated & my ashes made into a $5 token for the machines in Nevada, so I can go around & around & around & around in the slots & video poker machines forever!

You both rock! and get $50 Free chip.  

Please send me your usernames at Winpalace, so i could credit your accounts.

Cheers,
Daniel

1. How do you know if you are obsessed with gambling?‎

  When you find out your left you...5 years ago.

2. What was the best thing before sliced bread?

Sex and after too!

1. How do you know if you are obsessed with gambling?ý

*When you sell your home and rent a park bench in Vegas
*When you wish you hadn't sold those foodstamps for gambling money
*When you find yourself desperately seeking the best answers for a free chip contest on LCB
*When the most spoken phrase out of your mouth is "just one more spin"
*When you find yourself sitting in the corner in the fetal position sucking your thumb, rocking, chanting "I need a free chip,I need a free chip"


2. What was the best thing before sliced bread?

*gambling?*

how do you know when obsessed with gambling?
when you cant get casino machine sounds out of yer head.

1. How do you know if you are obsessed with gambling?ý

-You are obsessed with gambling when you throw in Potato Chips and call a dare!
-You find yourself buying Scratchers everyday.
-The alarm on your cell goes off reminding you of those Daily Freerolls...just incase you miss it.

2. What was the best thing before sliced bread?
OATMEAL!!!

1. How do you know if you are obsessed with gambling?ý

When the only thing left at home is a computer.

2. What was the best thing before sliced bread?

Potatoe Patties

2.  What was the best thing beore sliced bread?
                Unsliced bread.
1.  How do you know if you are obsessed with gambling?
                You name your kids Ka and Ching.

1.  How do you know if you are obsessed with gambling?
*when you insert text here to try and win a free $50 chip*